When There's So Much Light, Why Do I Feel So Dark?

So I have a suggestion to make between what's left of our's to break let's bottle all the misery I've ever had and make a franchise and sell it to the rich people in the world who don't have a care in the world, they'll pay thirty dollars a bar just for the things they don't have anymore and I'll reap the rewards and become one of them and when I run out, when I'm out of misery I'll buy a bottle of my own blood and bathe in it just to try to stay young, just to try to feel young again. Like an artsy film where I wear a suit all day and you carry a gun you beautiful woman of the world and you put it to my temple and I cry and I kiss you and I say, I know, I know, I know... The darkness has a pulse of it's own throbbing in the background like a constant reminder of the things we sold to get here, so light up another cigarette darling and watch us burn burn burn a hole into the skyline.

We'll burn a hole into the world where love is love is love and I'm no longer entangled in these one sided love affairs, like being pressed against the glass with mirror images in your glossy eyes reflecting the world as I want it to be and I can't look away despite you staring at me so terrifed from your warm sanctuary with your lovers crawling across your skin begging to be let in and I, I am respectful and I've lost everything I've ever wanted because of it. I can't stop, can't stop looking at you and wanting to take you in but this one sided love affair like an addiction to pain running in my veins and there isn't enough morphine in the world to make this pain go away in the midst of your voice and your gentle eyes that I pacify with what I want to see... Sick and twisted is my world in this one sided love affair even when the night falls and I am goddess, I am all powerful I can't control you, I can't protect you and I can't control you despite my greatest efforts and that, that my dear is killing me.

You'll never know what it's like to have me take you to the top of the world and give you everything you've ever wanted and such small dreams, such small dreams you have when I want to conquer the world and you want to live in peace but I've known warfare my entire life and even in my sleep I'm battling the evils of my past and my future and you can take the soldier out of the war but you can't take the war out of the soldier and sometimes my hands grasp for the blade that I don't use anymore and then I shake my head, deep breaths to gasp for the air so sickly poisoned with your words as I'm sinking down this wall into the oblivion beneath the hell that encases my fortifications and I'm tumbling tumbling tumbling down past the flames and the tar pits into the nothingness and emotionless beyond...

Burn burn burn.

Throw my arms outward and watch the flames burst like a grenade from inside of my ribcage and I don't mind being a causality for something as symbolic and beautiful as this is.

Burn.